It is what it is.

I believe I have calmed down quite a bit. I've come to realize that I can't change the past and can only deal with the future. I still feel upset at the fact that these test results were in my file the whole time, and I was not told. But I know I can not change that, so there is no reason to build up so much anger about it. I can only deal with what the new results tell me. I have to trust in god and know that he has my life in his hands. That what will become of this is what was meant to be.

I can only hope and pray for good results, but I know that wont change anything. It's going to be what it's going to be. So from here on out I can only educate myself on these conditions/illnesses and learn how to deal with or fight them the best way possible. I've researched everything he told me in my appointment and have a small understanding of each condition. So I'm some what prepared if the tests come back with any of these things. I will of course continue to pray that all tests are normal and we can just remove the Polyps and Hyperplasia by D&C. And life will go on as it has but we may be able to get pregnant. That, I believe, is the best scenario I can think of.

So I'm going to try and stop thinking about this until my next appt. I have an ultrasound scheduled for Wednesday and I hope to be able to get my test results then since the appt is at my Drs office. If not I'll have to wait 2 weeks after that for them. 2 weeks, thats like an eternity!!!